Unbelievable!

I can honestly say that this month will go down in my history as being one of the most trying, emotionally-turbulent times... ever! I believe it was the culmination of several things that brought me to this point, but one factor stands out the most.

To you, I ask, do you understand how UNBELIEVABLY amazing it is that God was in this the whole time? If our claims are true, if our burdens were really from God, and if words from other people were really from God, then do you truly understand the implications of the decision? (actually, I don't know why I'm asking, I know that you have already come to terms with all of this!)

I didn't understand at first. I called my sister Ema last Friday night and she ever-so-gently rebuked me... "Why are you so upset?! Because things didn't work out the way you thought they would? Didn't the Lord honor your request? You asked Him to give you an answer and He did!!!" Isn't she right? Man, God is so REAL! He didn't say "NO" in an audible voice... but He certainly said "NO" through conviction and through a sequence of events. Thank You, Lord, thank you thank you thank you for hearing the prayers of your children! Even though You said no to something that I so eagerly desired, I know that only good can come of this, as you promise in Romans 8:28!!

I am now learning what it really means to sacrifice... because it is so painful to have to give up something that you delight in so much... a source of goodness in your life. And this was the basis of my sadness- I was so sad at the Lord because He gave me something good and then took it away! "Was" being the operative word... I am no longer sad because the Lord has truly filled my heart with song, and with gladness. I have learned through this experience that there is SO much that I don't know about God's will for my life- and this has created in me an unbreakable, unchangeable dependance on Him.

So, what we share my friend, is a testimony of how God answers prayer and reveals Himself. Let us not hold back on using this to encourage others in similar situations... and let us never stop TESTIFYING!

What is left to say? Reliving the experience through words causes me to lift my head toward the sky, close my eyes, and breathe in the peace of the Lord....